a wonder

Today was a fabulous day. Ker Hui's drop dead gorgeous, that kinda caused me to actually feel self conscious. I admit I'm lucky to have such a pretty girlfriend, but i don't wanna be labelled as an extremely "heng" guy, just "heng" will do. =D And i guess its time to upgrade my ward robe. I'm stuck with the same clothes for quite some time already.

I certainly do wish for more of these kind of days. The holidays are somewhat draggy and monotonous for me, and days like these certainly brighten up my life. But as fate has it, these days are pretty hard to come by. I'm always free. And due to that, my beloved has decided to place me at the LAST of her priority list! Geez. I've gotta start acting busy! =D (but at the end of day, she's just gonna say she don't care. ah well. tough luck. haha)

Anyways, there is soccer tomorrow. Been ages since we've got 10 people who wanna play soccer. So yeap. The rain can come on Sunday instead. =)

It was great hearing you reminiscising about your past. It kinda got me thinking. Will my presence in your life have a great impact? Should anything happen to me, will I ever be forgotten?

i'm all about loving you

Looking at the pages of my life
Faded memories of me and you
Mistakes you know I've made a few
I took some shots and fell from time to time
Baby, you were there to pull me through
We've been around the block a time or two
I'm gonna lay it on the line
Ask me how we've come this far
The answer's written in my eyes

Every time I look at you, baby I see something new
It takes me higher than before and it makes me want you more
I don't wanna sleep tonight, dreaming's just a waste of time
When I look at what my life's been coming to
I'm all about loving you

I've lived, I've loved, I've lost, I've paid some dues, baby
We've been to hell and back again
Through it all you're always my best friend
For all the words I didn't say and all the things I didn't do
Tonight I'm gonna find a way

Every time I look at you, baby I see something new
It takes me higher than before and it makes me want you more
I don't wanna sleep tonight, dreaming's just a waste of time
When I look at what my life's been coming to
I'm all about loving you

You can take this world away
You're everything I am
Just read the lines upon my face
I'm all about loving yooooouuuuuuuuuuuuu

I'm all about, i'm all about, i'm all about loving you

Every time I look at you, baby, I see something new
it takes me higher than before and it makes me want you more
I don't wanna sleep tonight, dreaming just a waste of time
When I look at what my life's been coming to
I'm all about loving you

All about loving you..

I will never cause you to cry again. I promise.

memories

Whoa! IMF is finally over. Oh ya for those who didnt know, i'm working as a cost controller. In other words, a storeman. Well, before i started working, i had this perception that storeman means slogging away hours in the store simply by carrying boxes here and there. I thought it will be perfect for me to build up muscles.

Alas, cost controlling turned out to be extremely simple. It's actually more of admin work then physical work! Frankly speaking, the job scope wasnt exactly to my liking, but nevertheless, receiving goods from suppliers and checking whether the goods are up to standard or not, was a pleasant experience.

The suppliers were amusing people, for most of them are pretty much people who loves joking around. Thankfully, they were on very good terms with the full-time cost controllers. And this allowed us to "taste samples" which were enough to fill up our stomachs. Egg tarts, coconut tarts, strawberries, fishballs, sushi, you name it. And we got to devour them.

There were difficulties definitely. Such as keeping awake when there's really nothing left for us to do. (there were too much manpower i'll say). And the final day of work, counting the amount of stock remaining after the whole imf event. Surprisingly, things didnt go according to what was expected. Only a fifth of the items was used/consumed. Wonder how long it'll take to clear the remaining items.

It's pretty sad that IMF lasted only for a mere two weeks. I'll probably miss working with the great and fun loving supervisors over there. Cost controlling may not be a glamourous job as compared to serving the delegates, but, the experience i've gained is so much more than what being a waiter can offer. And with that, another chapter of my life has now been closed.

I'll give you the wings you desire, so do enjoy the view you have up there. And as long you remember i'm below waiting for you, I can safely say, i'm contented. =)

out of control

Like a lone soldier,
fighting hundreds by himself.
A lonely battle; a never-ending war
With his home in jeopardy,
Will it be a victory?
Or a defeat filled with misery?

Like a lone firefighter,
struggling with a sea of flame.
A horrific disaster; a monster untamed
With his life on the line,
Will it be cherished?
Or will he perish?

IMF. I shall take this time to recover.

the rule of reciprocation*

I realised after 2 months studying over at Temasek Polytechnic, I haven't blog about my experiences even once. Seems really bad considering this blog of mine is serving as a way to keep my memories. I guess it'll be really interesting reading them 10 years later.

It was awesome that I got into the same course as Ker Hui. But that was it. I was hoping that Cupid Angel will place us into the same class. Imagine being able to see each other, have lunch together, and go home together everyday. However, Cupid Angel has other plans for us. Perhaps it's even a test for me. A test of my character. Anyway.. even lovers need some time away, far away, from each other.

Cupid Angel may choose to ignore my wish, but Lady Luck took its place. So she placed one of my closest friends, Tat Yi, in the same class as me. And together with some fabulous classmates of mine, all with colourful personalities.

Of course, being me, i'm never satisfied. Well i wished there were more guys. What's the point of having so many girls in my class? (fyi, its 20 girls to 6 guys). With that, i'm reduced to playing soccer only once a week. Yeah, a rather drastic change from almost everyday in my secondary school days.

And thankfully, i didn't have much difficulty being part of a wonderful clique. 4 guys 4 girls. Jimmy and Han Lin make good friends and the four girls are really friendly and amiable in their own ways. But somehow i felt.. i didn't belong.

I'm never comfortable being around girls, as a matter of fact. Guess it's just my innate nature to be shy around girls. And also with my commitment with Ker Hui, I felt that i should't get too close to any other girls. It's probably because I don't want to see the same thing happening to me. She, being close to some other guy.

It might happen someday. I don't know. And I dare not think so much. Or maybe i'm just being too serious in this relationship. Of course.. I can push everything to "If things are meant to be, then it'll be".

If only it's that easy.

a revisit

Hello blog. It's been ages since i last posted. I'm sorry i've neglected you. And i'm sorry for only blogging whenever i'm not happy. But i could use some space to vent out my feelings. Type it all out. And get on with life.

After so long.. I realised I am still me. Yeah, the one who has this tendency to turn simple thoughts into extremely complex ones. In a negative way that is. And its not uplifting at all. In fact. i'm very badly affected indeed. And it has a major role to play in the break up of my previous 2 relationships.

1st was crap. I don't want to be reminded by it. But it was the 2nd that i kinda regretted. All was seemingly well. Until this bad habit of mine destroyed everything. And now, its threatening me to spill everything out.

Spill what out? Those complex thoughts that i have. Ridiculous thoughts. And i know once i say them out, things will be different. And it will definitely lead to the same outcome. A break up.

I don't know what to do. Let's just see how long i can take it.

---

I watched Superman today with my pals today. Great show. But it's a pretty predictable storyline. Good guys will always truimph over the bad asses. X men was better though in my opinion.

For those who watched, remember the guy named Richard? Yeah that guy who's vying with Superman for Lois Lane affection. I guess in the end he won. Make no mistake, both of them love the girl pretty deeply.

How the hell did he win? He can't fly, he doesn't have super strength, he doesn't have much abilities to save her. I kinda feel like I'm him. I don't feel as though im the best guy around. Or maybe i'm just not confident. There are other guys out there who are much better..

Ah. Rooney got sent off. Oh England, you're in deep shit.

happy birthday to you

Yup. It's Ker Hui 17th birthday today. And i had the honour to celebrate it with her on this very day. Her friends could have easily booked her, or her family. But I managed to pull off a tremendous victory! When she sees this, she'll surely say its because her family and friends aren't free. Ah damn it. Haha.

The day began real brightly. Been looking forward to this day since last week. In fact, it has been the driving force that allowed me to work without getting weary. We had fun. Ice age 2 was an awesome movie to watch on birthdays. For its simply light hearted fun and allows you to feel happy at the end of the movie. Dinner was great too. Fish & Co sambal grilled fish really got me perspiring all over. The surprise I had for Ker Hui didn't exactly go according to plan, but still it all worked out pretty well. It might not be the best, but i'm nevertheless satisfied. You're now looking at a model who's endorsing Fossil watch. Looking as pretty as ever.



I admit the photo wasnt exactly taken very well. The lighting was poor. But anyway, here's the close up view on the watch i gave her. =D


Nice eh?

Well.. things kinda went downhill towards the end. Its like having a sudden cold realization creeping on me. Yes. My day has turned into night, and April 1st is gonna be over soon. After forcing a smile as i waved goodbye to ker hui, my pals called me asking me if i would like to find them over at parkway to play pool. Some of them even wanna stay out till the very next morning.

I would love to. But unfortunately i can't. I've gotta work. And being a waiter needs concentration at all times. I've had lapses of concentrations before, and i almost end up breaking plates. Thankfully I didn't. Else i'll be a sorry sight.

April 14th's real soon. Less than 2 weeks in fact. I can do it right? I've done so over at Hang Ten before. That was even more hellish than what i'm going through at the moment. And i'm gonna get through this. Like what i've always believed in.. have faith and things will turn out fine =)

It's futile asking me to shower you with less love. I simply can't do it.

da chen xiao ai

Oh dear. I'm so addicted to this song and i've got no idea why. It's pretty surprising for at first i felt that this song(sung by wang lee hom) was crappy. Just like how i felt Kiss Goodbye was. But after listening it to a few more times, the melody became drilled in my head so deeply that i'm now addicted to it. Yes. It's playing now while i'm blogging.

Just returned home after having supper with Jon, Ben and Soo. Of course, its kinda out of place for me to be with them. Three of them are like the best of friends, and i'm pretty sure they'll stay good friends throughout their life. Cause of my work, I kinda feel as though I've drifted apart. But poly life will soon change everything. For the better or for the worst, that's the question.

I had so much to say. Yet suddenly i feel as though i'm better off keeping things to myself. Good nights all. I've got a long day tomorrow..

will the curse be lifted?

a love story

Though i don't have the mood to blog, but still i feel as though there's something i really want to get off my chest. Ironic thing is, i've got no idea what's bothering me. Ack.

Anyway, i've got a love story to share, which i find is really short and "sweet". You'll know why. Of course, it's not written by me. But i did edit a little.

Selfless love
(A guy with his girlfriend holding on tightly behind him were speeding over 140 mph on a motorcycle)

Girl: Slow down. I'm scared.
Guy: No this is fun. Speeding rocks!.
Girl: No its not. Please, its too scary!
Guy: Then tell me you love me.
Girl: Fine, I love you. Slow down!
Guy: Now give me a BIG hug. (Girl went on to hug him)
Guy: Can you take my helmet off and put it on? It's bugging me.

In the paper the next day: A motorcycle had crashed into a building because of a brake failure. Two people were on the motorcycle, but only one survived.

The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized that his brakes were faulty, but he didn't want to let the girl know. Instead, he had her say she loved him, felt her hug one last time, then had her wear his helmet so she would live even though it meant he would die.

-----------------

Awesome blackmailing there. And although chances are, both of them will be dead instead. How much can a helmet help? Anyways, hope you got the morale of the story. Love is simply selfless =D And this will give me the motivation to keep on giving.

Ker Hui's going Johor Bahru tomorrow. With the increasing crime rates over there, I can't help it but to be rather worried. Guess I'm gonna take a long time to pray tonight.


Those who are in love often say, "I'll do anything for you." But i realised it's impossible to do anything. Cause..how am i ever gonna break your heart? =)

random thoughts

Ahh!! I've been real lazy lately to update my blog. Or rather, i've got no idea what to blog at all. But now that i'm here, it shows that i've got something to rant about.

I've been working real hard over at Straitskitchen(Grand Hyatt hotel) for the sake of money. I figured out i roughly need at least 800 dollar. Let's hope i really do get that much. I've got so many things that i want to buy, or rather need to buy. (kerhui's present =D)

Pressuring definitely. *checks ker hui's blog* Oh dear, there's only 7 days and 20 hours left. I'm sure almost every guy who are attached are most stressed on Valentine's day and their significant other's birthday, which is of course what i'm going through now. Thankfully, the choosing of present wasn't tough. But simply buying a present isn't enough for me. So i hope i can be able to make something out of my own effort as well. To be revealed on April 1st =D

Backtracking to errr tuesday if i'm not wrong. Well that day i was out wib some pals of mine to play some late night pool, and eventually we went to some coffee shop for supper and for some chit chat. I got more information than what i bargained for as a matter of fact.

I've always thought i was someone who's considered easily jealous, pretty possessive and unbelievably insecure.(in the past, i think i've changed) Unexpectedly, i've got a pal who's even more so than me. I feel comforted actually that someone's actually thinking the same way as me and going through the same thing as me. But still, it's very wrong to be easily jealous.

This pal of mine also said that he gets very very jealous when he sees there's some other guy's message in his girlfriend's phone. And he would then tell his girlfriend about it and that it's unfair for him. This conversation then took place.

"Hey dude, don't you think it's rather possessive of you? You've gotta give her some freedom to make friends!" That's me. Although i would feel a little jealous as well. But i can't be so controlling can i?

"Well. I don't see a reason why she have to do it when i don't message any other girls except her"

"Yeah.. you've got a point there.."

Hmm. That left me pondering. Should such a situation befall me, should i kick a big fuss about it as well? Or should i just brush it aside? Well. Tough question eh?

He then added that sometimes he feel that gives so much more than he takes and that his girlfriend does not give as much as him. I almost wanted to like high-five him. I felt the exact same way in my previous relationships. But not with ker hui of course. I realised that sometimes you have to think about what your girlfriend actually did for you, instead of thinking of how much you give up for her etc. And this line will come real handy. Just because someone doesnt love you as much as you want her to, doesnt mean she does not love you with all that she has got.

Thats about all. I'm getting real sleepy. Woohoo. One more day of work and i'll get to see ker hui the day after =D Say cheeeeeeeers!


I knew from the start we were very different from each other. But opposites do attract and now i'm becoming like you, and you becoming like me. So much so that i'm already believing that we're really meant for each other. Do you?

the strength within

Yesterday was a stormy day. The first thing i received was a letter from Singtel indicating my bill for the month is 150 bucks. Come on man! I've already got no more money to prepare Ker hui's birthday and my poly clothes. This is huge blow man.

It was a scam. Don't ever download any tones from those companies that you can often see in the newspaper. I ended up paying 150 bucks for that stupid gorilla ring tone. But it was partially my fault. I failed to spot all the small words which said weekly subscription fee included. So do learn from my... costly mistake. I've gotta work 2 and a half days for it. Ow.

Cant believe i'm having money woes. I've always had enough to spend, but as i age, things do get more and more expensive. But it's good i guess, i'm actually saving more money now. And i'm quite pleased with myself! After having that setback, I immediately went to figure out how to solve this problem(or rather planning on how to save and spend money) instead of cursing my luck nor throwing tantrums. Meanwhile, i can only wish for more luck.

----



Well things did get better along the way. I had free food from Grand Hyatt hotel. And they're simply fabulous. But i've got no idea how am i going to finish all of them up. And i've still got this to finish.



If this carries on everyday, diabetes is inevitable. But still, it's really enjoyable =D

-----

It's our 3 months anniversary! Or rather the unofficial one. The official one's on 3rd of every month. Well why? 3rd of Dec was our first date whereas 16th of dec was the day we got together. By rights 16th should be the day ya? What to do, Ker hui insisted on 3rd being the nice date to remember. Heck, i both also remember =D



looking forward to our 100th anniversary

trip to malaysia

Late entry again! I realised almost all my entries are done in the wee hours of the night. What to do, it is often at night that i'll get my solitary peace and quiet to exhibit my nonsensical writing skills. (Ker Hui claimed that she'll accompany me through the night. Well now.. she's long ahead in dream land. Still, i'm rather touched that she said that and at least made tt effort. Nevertheless, its up for me to chase up with her =D)

I'm going Malaysia in like 5 hours of time. It's on purpose that i'm trying to sleep late because the journey to Ipoh isn't that exciting nor fun. It's boring. And so, i'll sleep on the journey instead. Awesome.

It's my mum's one year death anniversary on Sunday. Time flies doesn't it? It has been really quick.. so much so that it seemed like yesterday that i found out the heartbreaking news. I don't know man.. but I figured out I've been handling my mum's departure pretty well. But there's still this hope i can't seem to get rid of. And that is the hope that my mum will come back someday. But she is not going to. Sigh.

This trip is a must. And i have got no choice but to go on without ker hui for 3 long days. That's hell man. Lucky i've got some of her photos to tide me through this crisis =) Absence makes the heart grow fonder doesn't it?

That's about it. I'm going to catch my 3 hours of sleep. Actually i rather not sleep, i'll be even more tired. No choice. Dad insist.

being apart from you is the only time when days is equivalent to years..

a lesson learnt

Ooops. Pardon me for not updating more frequently. I've been working lately. Yes, i found myself another job in serving Grand Hyatt Hotel, well as a waiter to be more detailed. Well, the pay's definitely much better than Hang Ten, but it is way more strict in the hotel.

There's so much to be learnt. And there's simply no room for mistakes. One mistake and i'm pretty sure i'll be having my ears filled with scoldings. I'm kinda thinking whether taking hospitality and tourism management is the right thing to do. Do i really want to serve people my entire life?

Oh by the way, me and ker hui got into the same course =D I'm considered pretty fortunate actually. I've got a few good pals going into the same course as well. Hope we all end up in the same class.

I realised I've been handling money very carefully now. Perhaps after working, i truly understood what they mean by saying it's not easy to earn money. And i'm running low on money already! I've still got clothes to buy and ker hui's present. So i'm left with no choice but to be careful with my money.

Boring entry i guess. Just a filler post.

It's my good fortune that I've found you

brrr...

I swear i'm going to have a hard time waking up at 9 am tomorrow. Say if i sleep at 3, i'll get 6 hours of sleep. Well, that's sufficient considering i used to sleep 6 hours everyday when i still had to go school. But of course, that's excluding the naps I had taken during school lessons. PoA, Chinese, Geography, and A Maths were my favourite napping periods =D.

But my love for soccer is simply too strong. Just like my love for you. I don't mind going all the way to Woodlands just to have a soccer match nor would i mind playing in the rain. I don't mind sacrificing 1 hour of my time just to be able to see you for 1 minute nor would i mind cycling through the storm just to get that sweet potato you want from old chang kee =D Yeah. Passion drives me on.

I've always harboured hopes to be a professional soccer player. But as I grew up and reality begun to dawn upon me that I will never be able to make it big, I gradually lost faith and eventually I strike out the possibility. Perhaps that's the main reason what sets us apart from those who actually make it. They dare to dream, and they dare to fight for their dreams.

Enough nonsense. Guess i'll better go sleep now. And i'm going to score a goal for you. yes you =)




How can i ever be complete without you?

i miss school

It's really ironic really. When I was still schooling over at Ngee Ann, i've always been looking forward to the holidays. Holidays = more time with frens = more fun = an opportunity for me to charge up my batteries for school when it reopens. And now, boredom is consuming me.

Well..the holiday that i'm having currently is just simply way too long and the fact i won't be going back Ngee Ann anymore kinda bites. I don't think I'm ready for Poly life anytime soon. I just don't feel old enough. But isn't this all part of growing up?

I remembered one lesson on life my OBS(outward bound school)instructor taught me. Well she said on the last day of our obs camp, "In life, sometimes you get to meet new people and form new relationships, but it is also inevitable that you'll end up having to say goodbye to each other and go on your separate ways"

I believe she meant going on your separate ways on good terms. And not due to some quarrels or something. For example, my primary school friends. I used to have 2 close buddies to go out with me all the time. But now, they themselves made new friends and so do I. Eventually, we don't hung out that often anymore. However, i've always made it a point that we still hang out together once in a while.

That's the reason why I'm fearing how Poly life will turn out. Of course, I'm sure i'll make new friends but the thought of my current group of friends going on their separate ways isn't something i'm going to relish either. That's the reason why most people are resistant to change. Nobody sane would like to risk coming out of their comfort zone do they? But it's all part and parcel of life.

Enough crapping about of life. I've got more delightful things to share.

Well, there's a huge change in my blog as well. Yeah, a very obvious one fact. I've changed my blog's skin. Now i think this is less feminine and much more nicer. This thank you has been long overdue. So yeah thank you very much ker hui. =D

Even my handphone wasn't spared. I even have a new skin for it. Haha. Again, courtesy of ker hui. It's a gift from her, which i'm in love with of course. Can even glow in the dark!



So yup. Life's been real good for me lately. I'm starting work on Monday though. I hope things don't go downhill from there. =/

Life is never a bed of roses. But you've made one for me.

it's the only way out

Sometimes life just doesn't go smoothly as one would like to. Things may not go according to your favour nor will things be the way you want them to be. And you sit in a corner and ponder, what on earth should i do?

Perhaps taking a step back and having a bigger view will be a wise thing to do, instead of looking at things with a narrow mind. Problems are smaller and more manageable when you look at it with a more open-minded view. It gets tempting to start thinking narrow-mindedly but you just have to resist.

Taking this step back is not easy. For i am taking it now. Maybe tomorrow i'll lose all my determination and start thinking narrow-mindedly. But whatever it is...it's the only way out.

...and i dont wish to be trapped

at a loss

Man, i'm having a dilemna right now. So what is it that's bothering me? That is none other than money, the root source of evil.

It's virtually impossible to find someone who hate having more money in their pockets. Except for those monks, i'm sure most people would even love to die rich. Seriously yea, i've got to admit, there's so many things i would love to have, but i just don't have enough money to buy them all. =/ Poly school term is coming soon, i need update my wardrobe man. It's getting trashy.

And now there's a job placed right in front of me. But i'm actually reluctant to take it. I wish when i wake up tomorrow, i'll have the answer in my head. To take the job or not.

-----

Watched Final Destination 3 today. Or rather yesterday. Man, all i can say it has a stupid storyline, you're just simply gonna watch people die gruesomely. Maybe i'm really psychotic, but it's really hilarious to see the way they die. Especially this guy who kept deluding himself that death will never strike him. Well, it didnt strike him. It squashed him instead via the means of a tower collapsing on him. And when i say squashed, you really get to see him squashed. Hahahaha.

Other than that, i had a great day going out with her. She got herself a job(again!!!!), but well i can't be selfish can i? It's good that she can earn even more money to pamper herself and look even more beautiful. This is called a long term goal. =x Or investment. (im kidding btw =D). Seriously.. saying goodbye to her is really hard for I don't get to see her very often. May both of us get into the same class in poly!

Well. Didn't really expect i'll say so much. Oh by the way, here's some mission for those who still actually read my blog. Please leave a message in my tagboard. Wondering who you guys are.


Fancy some cash? Get me his head and $1000 is yours!

a wall

I myself was wondering how long will it last. The wall that i've built around my fragile self. The wall that has been helping me block out all sorts of negative thoughts and neediness. And today..the wall is showing signs of crumbling. And i can't seem to stop it.

It sure feels really weird. It's like deja vu. History is beginning to unfold right in front of my eyes for the 2nd time again. I'm like in front of a crossroad; and only one path is the right one. I've taken the wrong one before, and it seems like i'm taking the same path again. I don't want to.. but i can't help it.

Guess i'll just have to see how it goes. I'll just have to run around and make sure the wall that i've erected does not crumble. I'll just have to stick to the right path. I'll just have to live my life. And i'll just have to try my hardest. Make it or break it. Do or die. Now or never.

I hate it when i'll have to say goodbye to you.

metamorphosis

I finally realised what sets the Men and the Boys apart. Real men are sexually confident whereas those wussie boys are those who are needy.. insecure.. desperate.. obsessive and possessive.

And sad to say, I've got no choice but to admit that i belong to the boys. I've tried changing. Once bitten twice shy. In fact, i've got bitten twice. And maybe after being bitten twice, i've grown thicker skin, so much so that i'm repeating it the third time round.

But this time its special. I'm finally acknowledging that i've got a problem. And its pretty unfortunate that its my character wise that i've got a problem. Anyway, can it be remedied?

I can only try. So here are some guidelines i've made:

-Life does not revolve around her. You have your friends, your family, your games, your interest in soccer, guitar, there's simply so many more things to life.

-Sticking to her all the time will suffocate her. If you don't want to lose her, that's the only way.

-If things are meant to be, things will work out eventually.

-Absence makes the heart grow fonder. Give each other some breathing space.

-Girls hate wusses.

-They love men.


Ack. So i guess i've gotta stop being myself. But i see no other way out. My emotions are getting drained. It's now or never. I love advising people, time for me to advise myself. =)

-7 times. still counting.-

a quiet comeback

Sure feels weird to be back here. Been ages since ive written(typed) any long stories. I bet im gonna have even more grammatical errors now. Afterall, my previous entry was on 12th of november. Whoa.. time flies doesnt it.

And of coz, within these few months, tons of stuff happened. In short, i've slogged my life away over at hang ten, got myself a fabulous girlfriend in ker hui, and now awaiting for my o level results, which is only 2 days away from now.

I'm 17 now too. And ironically, i don't feel 17 at all. i don't feel as though i've grown. i still feel as though i'm the same old me. But yeah, i've probably changed.. only that i don't seem to notice it.

I've made another realization as well. It's only when i'm emotional that i'll feel the need to write, or rather, to vent out all my emotions. Bottling up my feelings is a torture. If only i had a mentor to guide me..

~*~*~*~*